Q: “My boyfriend refuses to go to a party with me this upcoming year because of his fear of getting caught and not being able to do sports. I want to go to one party this year just because I’ve never been to one but I’m afraid whoever I trust to go with won’t keep me in my drinking limit or will get in trouble because of their own drinking. How should I deal with this situation?”
A: Curiosity about parties is normal. Now that you are on your own, you have the freedom to choose whether or not to attend parties or start drinking. If your boyfriend does not want to attend parties, that is his right too. It can be risky, especially for student athletes because they could not only get in trouble with the law and the school, but with their coaches as well. Be understanding and respect your boyfriend’s choice.
Underage drinking, or even being around underage drinkers, always puts you at a risk to get in trouble with the law and your school. These are all things to keep in mind when you are making the choice to drink or attend parties at college. Other students have similar concerns as you. You and your friends should respectfully support and look out for one another when it comes to parties and drinking, but you are ultimately responsible for yourself. You need to keep yourself within safe limits and plan ahead. It’s always smart to limit your consumption so you remain in control of your choices, make sure to eat before drinking, and arrange for safe transportation home so you don’t have to rely on others later on.
Know that you and your boyfriend (or friends) can do other things that don’t put you at risk for getting in trouble. There are plenty of activities on campus that don’t involve drinking. Some campuses have movie nights or game nights, so consider those types of ideas when deciding your options. Talk with your boyfriend and other friends to see what kind of fun activities they’re interested in doing instead.